Assalamualaikum and hello, how are you?
It's interesting to note how intertwined my life as a student is to my identity as a person, because if someone asks me how I am I would answer it in terms of my university workload: "I haven't catched up with this week's lecture," "Struggling with assignments," "Good, just finished class". In a post from Cukup.Club , a blog I've been keeping up on focusing on mental health by Roshinee Mookaiah whom I had the chance to work with when I interned at Teach For Malaysia, this is called enmeshment whereby our identities become so intertwined with our intense workload, that we tend to overlook other important aspects of our life such as our social life, health and playtime.
Anyway, proceeding with the enmeshment (lol), it's already week 11 of the semester, with next week being the last one for my 3-year Psychology degree before finals. The Australian education system my university uses is a bit unfamiliar in the sense that degrees are 3-years long, with the 4th year called Honors being optional if you want to have a career such as research in that field. In other words, the Final Year Project (FYP) that is present in more common university systems like in Malaysia is something optional and separate from the degree. Days really just pass by, we went through the fasting month and raya while still in MCO. Not a big issue but my sleeping problems worsened, I think I didn't sleep the whole night for at least seven days (not in a row) just listening to loud thoughts in the dark.
Recently too, there has been a lot going on in this world, with people all over the world joining in to show protests against the murder of George Floyd, a black man who died from inhumane police violence. Details on how we can help which includes signing petition and donating for the Black Lives Matter cause can be found at https://blacklivesmatters.carrd.co/ . This issue has led to the bringing up of discrimination happening in our own country, whether towards other races, migrants, or dark-skinned people. I'm glad that we all get to educate ourselves more on this matter and able to realize that we can and should take active measures against racism and discrimination, even from our own family members.
I actually started to write this post with the intention to participate in the #IamBecoming journaling activity prompted in Cukup.club haha. Social media accounts posting about mental health have been really helpful in these uncertain times in keeping people grounded, and I am so thankful for that. I wanted to rest for a while after completing a 3000 word project before catching up on my lectures and readings and quizzes and the two 1500 word assignments I have due next week. So this was the prompt given on the blog:
It's interesting to note how intertwined my life as a student is to my identity as a person, because if someone asks me how I am I would answer it in terms of my university workload: "I haven't catched up with this week's lecture," "Struggling with assignments," "Good, just finished class". In a post from Cukup.Club , a blog I've been keeping up on focusing on mental health by Roshinee Mookaiah whom I had the chance to work with when I interned at Teach For Malaysia, this is called enmeshment whereby our identities become so intertwined with our intense workload, that we tend to overlook other important aspects of our life such as our social life, health and playtime.
Anyway, proceeding with the enmeshment (lol), it's already week 11 of the semester, with next week being the last one for my 3-year Psychology degree before finals. The Australian education system my university uses is a bit unfamiliar in the sense that degrees are 3-years long, with the 4th year called Honors being optional if you want to have a career such as research in that field. In other words, the Final Year Project (FYP) that is present in more common university systems like in Malaysia is something optional and separate from the degree. Days really just pass by, we went through the fasting month and raya while still in MCO. Not a big issue but my sleeping problems worsened, I think I didn't sleep the whole night for at least seven days (not in a row) just listening to loud thoughts in the dark.
Recently too, there has been a lot going on in this world, with people all over the world joining in to show protests against the murder of George Floyd, a black man who died from inhumane police violence. Details on how we can help which includes signing petition and donating for the Black Lives Matter cause can be found at https://blacklivesmatters.carrd.co/ . This issue has led to the bringing up of discrimination happening in our own country, whether towards other races, migrants, or dark-skinned people. I'm glad that we all get to educate ourselves more on this matter and able to realize that we can and should take active measures against racism and discrimination, even from our own family members.
I actually started to write this post with the intention to participate in the #IamBecoming journaling activity prompted in Cukup.club haha. Social media accounts posting about mental health have been really helpful in these uncertain times in keeping people grounded, and I am so thankful for that. I wanted to rest for a while after completing a 3000 word project before catching up on my lectures and readings and quizzes and the two 1500 word assignments I have due next week. So this was the prompt given on the blog:
I initially wanted to type them all down and post it here but I think it's too personal to be shared publicly. I guess I'll just talk about number 3. I feel like my proudest moment was when I did my exchange in Melbourne, and after the semester ended I joined a lot of travelling activities, with one of them being going to Wilsons Promontory National Park and climbing up Mount Oberon with Hidayati.
There was just a lot of feelings attached to this. Firstly, I did it with my parents really trying to stop me from it (although they agreed at the end because they knew I would go anyway). They were worried for my heart which had some problems as it was weak, and I did worry about that a bit so I felt extra proud that I got to do this. Next, I loved how impulsive this whole trip was. Me and Hidayati literally saw an ad for this on Facebook, and there we were joining in a bus full of strangers for a 3-hours long journey more than 200kms away. It also felt so freeing: I was struggling a lot adjusting in Melbourne in terms of feelings of loneliness and academics, but this was something I'm doing for the sake of me wanting to do it. Plus, back in Malaysia, I'm almost always at home 24/7 as my family sees me going out on my own as being dangerous, even on public transport and all. I don't know if it was the cool weather and the majestic scenery too, because ya Allah, the feeling of reaching the top with the cold refreshing wind blowing and looking at the view I never thought I would be able to see in my life as a couch potato were undescribable. I'm also reflecting on how what I consider as my proudest moment isn't related at all to an academic achievement, or how others view me, or if it was of doing something for another person. It's just me half dead from a hiking trip hahaha, and it doesn't attach my worth to anything. I'm wondering on what this means on the experiences I find valuable and meaningful, what I actually want deep down inside, and what actually makes me happy.
So that's that. Going back to outside-academics activities, I think I've mentioned (?) that my family and I have been watching Bollywood movies on Netflix haha. We watched Kuch Kuch Hota Hai, Khabi Khushie Khabi Gam (is this the correct spelling), Dilwale, Phir Bhi Dil Hai Hindustani and Dangal. Loved them all except for Dilwale lel. We also watched the free one-week Youtube screening of the musicals The Phantom of the Opera and its sequel Love Never Dies. My mum and I have also kept up with the Korean drama starring Lee Minho and Kim Go Eun, The King: Eternal Monarch up until episode 13. I've also been really into NU'EST (again) haha, supporting their comeback and watching their TV appearances and shows on Youtube.
Ending this post with three songs I have recently listened to a lot:
NU'EST's Moon Dance from their latest album The Nocturne. The only way I can describe this song is that it's so pretty.. According to the member Minhyun who wrote the lyrics, he was thinking of La La Land while writing it. It's so soothing as well. Probably my favorite song from the album.
NU'EST's Minhyun's solo song Universe. I've listened to this when it came out over a year ago, but am only appreciating it more now haha. Another beautiful song. Am also amazed at how such a beautiful voice can exist in this world, don't mind me fangirling.
TXT's Can't You See Me? This is BTS' junior group as they are from the same company. I don't really listen to their other songs, but this one caught my attention because of the creepy music and music video here about the members killing each other haha. Also that one part where they moved their heads scarily is.. interesting. Because they are from the same company I guess, their music arrangement, singing style and overall editing (?) of the audio remind me of BTS.
Thanks for reading!
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