I'm writing this after having to excuse myself from the dining table for lunch to go cry in my room lol.
Assalamualaikum and hi, how are you?
I have to admit I was confident as an introvert that I would be totally unaffected by this quarantine but boy, am I wrong. Been feeling absolutely like trash for the past week especially and it isn't helping when you have 3 submissions due in a week and have trouble falling asleep and end up sleeping after 4AM every day.
So in today's trigger I would like to talk about my cats and kittens. There were 4 cats and 7 kittens in my house. As much as I love these feline creatures, I have to admit that I have been extremely emotionally burnout in taking care of all of them with my family, worrying every morning after 2 hours of sleep if they are still alive, cleaning their litter box etc. Recently, one by one of the kittens began to die until there's only one left currently. And it's just so sad when you know one of them is dying and you desperately try your best to keep them alive but it's all just hopeless and you just feel... helpless.. to know you'll be digging your backyard the next day and bury these beings you have loved and taken care of.
It's so heartbreaking, that I just ordered 4 boxes of wet kitten food online thinking of feeding the kittens over time and when the food arrived, there's only one left alive. I'm just.. so sad.. I feel so guilty. zzzzz am crying while typing these all out don't mind me.
Sometimes I just wish I don't have to take care of them. None of the cats that have stayed in my house are adopted or picked up from the streets. They just arrive out of the blue and.. stay? I don't have the capacity to take care of cats but they just... come... I've messaged adoption centers knowing this and they just told me that they are also having their maximum capacity of kittens/cats and cannot take anymore.
Hey kittens. I'm so sorry this has happened to you but I hope you all are in a better place now. I feel so guilty to you and your mother that you end up this way. Just know that not a night passes by without me thinking of all of you, thinking of all the 'what ifs' and imagining how it would have been to see you all grown up.
I'm so sorry.
Assalamualaikum and hi, how are you?
I have to admit I was confident as an introvert that I would be totally unaffected by this quarantine but boy, am I wrong. Been feeling absolutely like trash for the past week especially and it isn't helping when you have 3 submissions due in a week and have trouble falling asleep and end up sleeping after 4AM every day.
So in today's trigger I would like to talk about my cats and kittens. There were 4 cats and 7 kittens in my house. As much as I love these feline creatures, I have to admit that I have been extremely emotionally burnout in taking care of all of them with my family, worrying every morning after 2 hours of sleep if they are still alive, cleaning their litter box etc. Recently, one by one of the kittens began to die until there's only one left currently. And it's just so sad when you know one of them is dying and you desperately try your best to keep them alive but it's all just hopeless and you just feel... helpless.. to know you'll be digging your backyard the next day and bury these beings you have loved and taken care of.
It's so heartbreaking, that I just ordered 4 boxes of wet kitten food online thinking of feeding the kittens over time and when the food arrived, there's only one left alive. I'm just.. so sad.. I feel so guilty. zzzzz am crying while typing these all out don't mind me.
Sometimes I just wish I don't have to take care of them. None of the cats that have stayed in my house are adopted or picked up from the streets. They just arrive out of the blue and.. stay? I don't have the capacity to take care of cats but they just... come... I've messaged adoption centers knowing this and they just told me that they are also having their maximum capacity of kittens/cats and cannot take anymore.
Hey kittens. I'm so sorry this has happened to you but I hope you all are in a better place now. I feel so guilty to you and your mother that you end up this way. Just know that not a night passes by without me thinking of all of you, thinking of all the 'what ifs' and imagining how it would have been to see you all grown up.
I'm so sorry.
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